I’ve always been a procrastinator.
My mom used to tell ones that her due date for my arrival into the world was June 20. And, like clockwork, there was I was — not June 19th, not June 23rd — Boom! June 20th!
She would then quip, “It was the only time that he’s ever been on time.”
Bahaaahahaahaaa! Whew, that mom of mine! She’s a side-splitter that one.
In actuality, however, she was — as The Fonz would say — “Correctamundo”.
I was always running late for things my entire life or waiting for the last possible second to get something done. Homework. Chores. Getting ready for school. I was perpetually “living on the edge.”
I still do it. In fact, when I write my columns — such as this one — I usually do so on the very day The Vista must go to press. Most writers would get it done ahead of time. Not me … again, on the edge, baby.
Perhaps it is because I am used to deadline pressure. During all those years at daily newspapers, I would cover big games that concluded late, giving me 30 minutes to crank out my game story.
Or, as an editor, paginating a 12 page sports section with the clock ticking; deadline drawing near. If I was late it resulted in the paper getting out late, the pressroom screaming obscenities and subscribers not getting their precious paper at their door in the morning.
I loved the pressure and, at the same time, hated it. But with me, that kind of pressure was good because it was a red-hot poker prodding me to “get er done”. Otherwise, I would have waited and tried to do it all at the eleventh hour — and likely been looking for work.
So, it’s my nature to delay. I even did so in regards to my health recently. For weeks, I had pain, achiness and numbness stemming from my neck down my should and arm.
Progressively, it got worse. Progressively, I put it off. I am a progressive procrastinator. That’s sheer talent. It takes determination and a measure of stubbornness.
Eventually, I went to a chiropractor and found I had a bulging disc in my neck and a resultant pinched nerve.
The nerve of the doctor telling me that I almost waited too long!
Hey, if I want to be spontaneous … I will do it tomorrow.
Benjamin Franklin once said, “ You may delay, but time will not.” Well I say ‘ol Ben was boring.
I concur with Mark Twain who said, “Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.” Mark got it. Fun guy, that Mark.
I am timely in one respect — I never put off procrastinating.
Some have said that, if it weren’t for the last minute, some things would not get done.
Now, all things having been said, do I agree with that theory?
Not sure. Can I let you know tomorrow?